Whats in my purse

I saw this on another blog and had to do it. Here goes:

Wallet with a massive amount of receipts so big that I have trouble closing it.
Car keys with 3 keys on it
Office keys with 6 keys on it
Regular size bottle of Jergens Shimmer Body Lotion
4 pens
1 pencil
2 black Sharpies
Hair clip
Rubber Band
2 cough drops
4 gum wrappers
Directions from my physical therapist on how to manuever my neck (worthless, should throw that away)
The boys excema precription that I need to fill pronto
Bottle of black fabric paint
Bottle of pink fabric paint
6 Avon Lipsticks
2 eyeliners
2 mascaras
Clinique double day face powder
Clinique blush
Avon eyeshadows set of 4
2 paychecks stubs
1 paycheck stub from hubby
Silver jangly anklet
2 necklaces
3 Bandaids
Eyeglass holder (no glasses in it)
Eyeglass blankie to clean them
.65 loose change
Nextel phone bill
4 yrs worth of receipts from the girls cheer uniforms (don't ask me why)
1 lighter
Warranty and receipts to new washer/dryer
1 sticker of Stewie from Family Guy saying "Hello? Get me the Pentagon?
Pair of earings (ooohh that's where they went to)
Bottle of Vicks Vapor Rub
Recipt from phys therapist (again worthless)
3 napkins from Mc D's
2 Best Buy bucks from the above
Orange stupid fucking rubber band that I'm supposed to use per the useless therapist I have now stopped going to
1 blank index card (what the fuck?)
$5.00 bill
Amarato business card (jewlers)

ok, Im off to clean out my purse. Fuck, I didn't think I had that much crap in this bag. No wonder I can never find my keys or cell phone once it goes in there.