tHE bURNS

We have a rule.....everybody's fair game whilst in the house. Meaning any and all burns are a go as long as they're not in front of other people. We don't want to look like total pychos now. So I've compiled a list of burns that I can think of on such short notice so that I can always cherish our weird family tradition.

HUBBY - " I feel like a fat golfer"

Girl (while walking away) - "Ya got one part right!"


HUBBY - "OOOhhh I knew where I should've gone"

Girl (from the backseat of the truck) - "CURVES!"


HUBBY (trying on a yellow shirt with black jean shorts) - "I don't like it".

Girl (loudly so that the saleslady can hear) - "Awww...who's my little bumblebee!"


GIRL (to Hubby when saying he needed to lose weight)- "Haven't you heard of SlimFast?"

Boy (in resonse) - "Obviously, you haven't"


BOY (while watching his Dad miss some fly balls he was throwing at the girls at practice) "Excuse him girls, he's obviously sober today!"

Me (to the boy) "What did your Dad want?

Girl (in response) "To move out."

The girl, (while talking to hubby's belly button: "Hellooooo...Hellooo...echooooo..echoooo."



Girl: "How come you didn't call me at midnight on New Years?"

Hubby: "How come you didn't call me. I'm the dad, your supposed to call me."

Girl: "Well, I guess we both missed out then, huh."



The girl spent the night at her aunt and uncle. A week before that, Uncle fell down some stairs they have in the living room.....to which the girl calls out ........

Girl : Uncle! Uncle!.....Watch.....whoa whoa whoaaaaaaa (as she re-enacts the fall that caused her uncle great pains and aches....smart ass I tell ya)